In Henry’s final days, as it became clearer to me that he was going to die, I told my husband, brother and sister that I wanted to create a lasting legacy for my son, and for his four younger siblings – the three who were already with us, as well as the littlest, who would be born only 3 weeks after her big brother died. I didn’t know exactly what shape this would take beyond one thing; I wanted to make it easier for families with drug addicted teenagers like Henry to pay for high quality treatment, and I wanted Henry to know this before he was gone.
On the day that Henry died, as I sat on his bed, rubbing his giant teenage-boy feet – still tanned with the criss-cross strap marks from his Chaco sandals, even after 38 days of hospitalization – I told him what I wanted to do in his name. I told him that I hoped he would be proud of the work we would undertake, and that I would make sure that people heard his story because as much as he’d wanted to, no one in authority had cared enough to give him a chance to tell them his story himself before it was too late.
And that’s how Henry’s Fund was born.
Only 20 months later, Henry’s Fund has already accomplished so much. And there’s one person who is responsible for that, and that person is Henry’s aunt and my sister, Betsy Allison Tant.
Henry with his Aunt Betsy
Working thus far with no real office, no staff and no salary, Betsy currently spends 20-50 hours working as Executive Director for Henry’s Fund. She liaisons on behalf of Henry’s Fund with the wonderful East Tennessee Foundation, serves in a leadership role with the Metropolitan Drug Commission, maintains and grows the award-winning Henry’s Fund Facebook page, manages fundraising and grant distribution, speaks to groups large and small all over our area, and spends huge amounts of time on the phone and in person with desperate parents attempting to navigate the health care system in order to quickly get their addicted teens and young adult children into treatment.
Betsy, who has her undergraduate degree in education, as well as her MSW, had worked with at risk children as a teacher before becoming a stay at home mom to her own three children in the years before her beloved firstborn nephew died of a drug overdose. Today, Betsy is combining her professional background with the deep love she had for her nephew, and in her role as te Executive Director of Henry’s Fund, she’s increasingly recognized as one of the most articulate and well-informed voices in our region on issues of adolescent drug addiction and treatment access. I have absolutely no doubt that soon, her insight, advocacy and expertise will be impacting these issues on the national stage.
Betsy at the Henry’s Fund booth at an addiction awareness event.
When she speaks on behalf of Henry’s Fund, Betsy frequently makes clear that she would give anything not to be doing the work that she now does. I know this is true. I know the incredibly special and deep bond shared by Henry and his “Aunt-a B,” as he called her when he was a toddler – from the day he was born until the day he died. She misses him just as much as I do, and he adored her. But I also believe that Betsy was called to do this work. This is her life’s calling, and the career she was meant to have. I know that Henry would be so proud of her, just as all the rest of us who love her are.
Many big “next steps” will be happening for Henry’s Fund in the year ahead, thanks 100 percent to the passionate, strategic, hard working and visionary leadership of one person: Betsy Allison Tant. I’m not entirely sure that people realize how hard Betsy has worked and continues to work to grow and develop Henry’s Fund and its life saving work.
I love you Bets. You were the best auntie imaginable to our boy, and he loved you so very, very much.
I am so inspired by what you’ve accomplished already in his memory. I can’t wait to see what great places you will be taking Henry’s legacy of hope in the months and years ahead.
xoxo – Kate
Henry and Auntie B on a trip to the mountains.
What a lovely tribute to Besty. I don't know her, but she seems like a pretty special person!
This brought tears to my eyes, Katie. You are so blessed to have such an amazing sister, and it's easy to see why Henry adored her so. He would no doubt be proud of the hard work she's doing in his name. Keep up the great work, Betsy!
I am so proud. I, too, wish it were not so, but it is and Henry's Fund is saving the lives and futures of other young people.
Such sweet sisters! And once again, Aunt Betsy Rocks!
What a beautiful tribute to someone doing such important work.
A great poem is a fountain forever overflowing with the waters of wisdom and delight .
Beautiful story. Beautiful sister.
When I watched Henry's Story, I was so struck by the depth of Betsy's pain while she was talking, and it was so obvious that she loved him as if he were one of her own children. When she talked about leaving his hospital room for the last time as she took the other children to the beach, and how she kept going back into the room because she just knew she wouldn't see him again was so incredibly touching. It is truly inspiring to see her channel that pain into helping families and young people. And to do it for no salary is just amazing.
Salary aside; I think that's an unquestionable, moot point; I, too, was struck by Betsy's pain – heart wrenching. I am actually envious of your beautiful relationship; I have none and I have four sisters. You are more than fortunate in my book.
I love the bond you share with your sister. What a beautiful way to show it!!!
I love the bond you both share. What a beautiful way to show it!!!
You guys are an inspiration! I love the closeness of your family and I love the fact that you want to help others through tragedy. Henry is oh so very proud of you all!
Thank you
This is a wonderful tribute to an amazing woman. Henry was so loved and cherished and all of you are honoring him in such a remarkable way. Thank you!
Your family is amazing. Thanks for sharing. I love ya'll.
I can speak from personal experience that this is truly Betsy's calling. Just two weeks ago today, she came speak with my daughter who was deep into a bad relapse. My daughter loved Henry, they dated in high school a few years back. She had met Betsy a few times then. Some would say it was that history that caused Melissa to listen and respond so intently to what Betsy said to her. I can tell you…because I wept in awe…that God and Henry were speaking through Betsy. I love this family with all my heart!!!
And this family is in awe of your baby's strength, courage and determination!
Thank you for that
Tears fill my eyes but pride fills my heart. Henry is her Spirit Guide. His arms must be sore from dragging her. Love to you all…
Tina- I'm so proud of you and Melissa and I'm in awe of the strength and love you have for each other. I can't wait to give M a big hug.
Betsy, Katie and the entire Anderson / Allison clan are some of the strongest, amazing, warm and frankly most interesting people I have been blessed to know. Henry's Fund is possibly the most generous use of passion, talent and channeling of grief I can imagine. Keep up the good work !!
Beautiful. I love Aunt Betsy, and I don't even know any of you!
Thanks a million times over for sharing your story and letting the world know that if this (addiction) can happen to your educated, strong and LOVING family, this can happen to anyone. You have helped more people than you will ever know.
Henry was so, so lucky to have you all.